2002-03-22 00:24 | mary_c_z


A Tale of The Journey To The West

Once there was true love for me, but I did not treasure it. Now it’s too late to regret. Nothing in the world can be more painful than that. If only time could go back, if only God could give me one more chance, I would say to the girl: “I love you.” If you dare ask me how long my love will last, my answer will be at least 10,000 years.

孙悟空 Monkey ( M for short ) 白骨精 Jenny White ( J for short )
唐僧 Tang Seng ( T for short ) 黄袍怪 Yellow ( Y for short )
沙僧 Sha Seng ( S for short ) 猪八戒 Piggy ( P for short )
观音 Guan Yin ( G for short ) 小妖 Mini Monster ( A B C D )

Act 1
J 照着镜子上台,后面跟着一个小妖B手捧一盒化装品,如Clean & Clear等
J: Another pimple!
All these lotion and cream and gel are of no use. What can I do?
Y: Hello! It’s me.
J: I know it’s you. You’ve been calling me every day since 400 years ago.
Y: And today, I’ll ask the same question again. This is the 99th time I ask you to marry me.
J: To hell with you! I’m busy with my face now. I’ve got one more pimple. How terrible! I’ll
never see anyone unless I can cure it.
Y: Ah! That’s easy. I just call to tell you that I’ve read a book, and it said the meat of Tang
Seng can make your skin feel as smooth as silk, and make you more beautiful than any other witch in the world. What’s more, I’ve just got the news that Tang Seng will soon come into our territory. We can go and catch him together. Is this idea wonderful?
J: All right. All right. I’m going to hang off.
J: How nasty he is! ( 她想了想,对B道 ) But Tang Seng is really tempting. I’ll keep tabs on his
J: ( 欢喜万分 ) Ah-ha, there he is!
J: ( 向B伸手 ) Bring me my Magic Ear.
T: Monkey! I’ve told you a million and once times,that our journey to the western Paradise is
tough and challenging. If it is not, how can people know that we are great and unique; how can we be heroes remembered by others; ( 向台下悄悄说 ) how can we make millions of girls faint for us? So……
P: Sir! I’m so hungry.
T: I know that. I’m hungry too. So Monkey, would you please go and buy some food?
Remember that we have very little money, only 2 yuan for a week. So you should not go to those expensive restaurants, such as Dining Hall 6 and 2, just go to Dining Hall 1. Even if the dining hall is too far away, don’t buy the take-out. It’s not clean. I advise you to go to some old lady’s house and ask for some 馒头. Mind you, don’t forget to wash your lunch-box first!
J: It’s a good chance.
P: Ah, here comes an old lady. Hello granny! What’s in your basket? Smells nice!
J: Some pancakes for my son. He is working in the field.
P: I’m hungry. Can I have some? Only a little bit.
T: Piggy! I’ve told you a million and once times, remember to be polite to old ladies.
J: You are very kind. It looks as if you are starving and need some food. I can give you some for
T: ( 双手合十 ) 阿弥陀佛,善哉善哉。
M: ( 一把抓住了J的手腕 ) It’s not a hand of an ugly old lady. Who are you? An ugly old
J: You……you dare touch my hand!
M: Monster!
P: Beautiful lady
M: No matter how powerful you are, I’ll kill anyone who tries to harm my master.
J: No matter how powerful you are. I’ll kill anyone who prevents me from beautifying myself.
M: Monster! Take my stick!
P: Beauty, run! Run away!
T 逃过一劫,对各位徒弟尤其是M的拼死保护感动之至,情不自禁地唱起了Only You。其结果,三个土地全头痛欲裂,大吐特吐。
T: ( 清清嗓子 ) Monkey, go and buy the lunch. I’m starving to death.
M: I’ll draw a circle here. ( 边走边画 ) Just stay in the circle and you’ll be safe. Don’t trust anyone. Good bye sir.
J: Ouch!
J: Come, come and eat this. Come and eat this.
M: You again!
J: You touch my hand again! How nasty you are!
M: Now you cannot run away!
T 刚刚清醒,想到自己又一次有惊无险,不仅又唱起了Only You。M不堪忍受此歌声,抓着J的手也放松了。J乘机溜走了。
P: ( 调侃地 ) Ah, that beautiful witch has taken your heart away.
M 回过神来,发现自己的失态,给了P一拳。
T: Monkey, I know that witch is nice, but you can’t fall in love with her. Beacause you are a
monkey and she is a witch. Monkey should marry a monkey and witch should marry a wizard. Even if a monkey can marry a witch, I bet there are hundreds of wizards fighting to marry her. How can you defeat them? What is more, chasing girls needs time, energy and money. Now, you have to go to the Western Paradise with me, you don’t have enough time. To make things worse, we have only 2 yuan per week to live on, yoyu don’t have enough money.
M: Surely I won’t. How can I fall in love with a witch who wants to eat my master?
T: That’s fine. I can rest assured. I’m hungry, where is my lunch?
M: Here. Please sit in the shade of the trees over there. I’ll go and fetch some water.